GENIUSES OF LOVE MOTHAFUCKA
(a night of lonely hearts)
Geniuses of Love!
Galapagos
Back room
Feb 14
8pm
$5
70 North 6th Street
between Kent and Wythe
Williamsburg, Brooklyn, NY 11211
718 782-5188

Do you feel like love is hiding from you? Maybe it's hiding in the forest of self-doubt, or in the mall of recriminations. It could even be in the dentist's office of despair. Wherever love is hiding, love experts Becky Yamamoto and Tony Carnevale will help you sniff it out. Join them and an army of entertaining special guests at 8pm on Valentine's Day at Galapagos. Featuring: Rachel Kramer Bussel, Chelsea Peretti, Patrick Borelli, Lang Fisher, Michelle Collins, Carolyn K. Castiglia, Alan Fessenden, Joe Randazzo, Frank Philbrick, Mike Barry, sketch group A Week of Kindness, and the band Ladystein.

grizzly man

I saw "Grizzly Man" last night, that documentary about this man who loved bears so much he lived with them in the forest and eventually got eaten by a bear. Some called him "retarded" others thought of him as a kindred spirit, and others saw him as a meal. (this is my shortened version. Maybe you should see it on your own and come to your own conclusions. I don't claim to be a movie reviewer, but I think I would give it 3 out of 5 paws.)But this bear here, this bread bear is my revenge on that bear. I can eat this bread bear and it can't fight back. Or bear claws, those delicious pastries that you serve with coffee in the morning and serve 4-5 people. Yum. I could eat a bear claw and dive into this bear bread. I am making myself hungry. I could also then eat a fruit plate and maybe an egg sandwich and then wash it down with some coffee or maybe a tea.

so

So maybe you think this discussion about Michelle Kwan is over, but it's not. Hey, she's got big nostrils. I said it and I don't care.
No. I don't mean to be such a jerk. I just wanted to see how much I could really write about her and somehow relate it back to me.

Let's have this discussion. I'm on the Asian tip now. So, I know most of us look the same, us Asians and you can't tell the difference between a Korean and a Japanese. Fine.
Here take this test http://www.alllooksame.com/default.asp and see if you know your Asians. I failed the test. I don't know my Asians. Honestly I think they trick you by having Asians with dyed hair. The dyed hair will get you every time. Is that guy um? Shit. Clearly that guy is like...I have no clue.
It's fine. Admit it. I look like Woody Allen's wife/daughter and Connie Chung. It's fine.

michelle kwan?

So Michelle Kwan...an obvious topic of discussion for me. As a kid, the only Asian sports figure I looked up to was that tennis player Michael Chang. In fact when he won the US Open or whatever, my dad took me to the tennis court to hit some balls around (tennis balls). I think we both knew I would never be a tennis star, but it was worth dreaming, right?
So Michelle Kwan, she may go to the Olympics. Maybe I can go one day too. The first time I went ice skating with my Girl Scout troupe, my mom sensibly packed a white leotard and tights. The other girls had curduroy pants and I was left there to look like an ice princess. My mother knew then what I know now...that I was meant to skate. I am here to skate for you.

cute

The cute thing. So there is that recent
New York Times article about cuteness and it got me thinking about cuteness. Part of the reason Pandas have survived extinction is due to how irresistably cute they are. I'll admit it. I wish I could cuddle with a Panda. And sure, I love things that are cute. I'll even go "ooh" "awwww" and tilt my head at cuteness.

It makes me wonder... If there were a huge Panda that wanted to take over the world would we let it just because it's cute? I think we would. And the Panda would make us do weird things like build amusement parks based on bamboo and make our children speak Panda and we'd have to wear mits to make our hands look like bear paws. I'm not saying we'd be miserable. I'm just saying that life would be very very different from the life we know now.
There would be libraries where the only things you could borrow would be rodents and bamboo seeds to grow bamboo. Also, no one could ever wear a pelt of any kind. We'd be oppressed dammit, and the ugly things of the world, the haggard opossum would laugh and say, "Look, it's your own damned fault. You let a Panda rule the world". And there would be tears.

upcoming things

Brutal Honesty
January 10
8pm
Otto's Shrunken Head
Free!
This month's topic:
Temp Jobs!

Featuring:
Lang Fisher
Baron Vaughn
Joe Devito

and as always hosted by Lianne Stokes, Giulia Rozzi and me



and coming soon:















Geniuses of Love!
aka Tony Carnevale and Becky Yamamoto
Feb 14 2006
Galapagos Art Space
with special guests
8pm

Yamaholiday Spectacular!

Hi all!
Yamaholiday!
A masterpiece of things!
Songs! Spectacle! Men! Women! Elves!
Eggnog!

December 9
Galapagos
8pm
$5
with the Flanks!






I hope to see you all there.

Featuring the talents of:

Lang Fisher
Michelle Collins
Michael Cyril Creighton
Baron Vaughn
Desiree Burch
The Fabulous Entourage
Tony Carnevale
Joe Randazzo
Jon Friedman
Lianne Stokes
JB Rote
Becky Poole
Jimmy Owens
Daiva Deupree
JJ Shebesta
Sara Schaefer
Michal Pasternak

Be there!

a list of things i have sorted

Not to get all into one topic and then obsess over it but....

Here is a list of things I have sorted, and how I sorted each item.

JEANS
1. Alphabetized jeans according to wash names.
(skills needed: a strong grasp of the alphabet.)
2. Sorted jeans according to manufacturer.
(This is almost turning into a resume. I didn't mean for that to happen, but
incidentally,if anyone is hiring, let me know.)
3. Picked out ugly jeans and put them into the trash
(You need a good eye for ugly jeans. A real good eye.)

LEGAL FILES
1. Arranged files in an alphabetical order according to case name and case number.
(similar to skill set mentioned in "JEANS" no. 1)
2. Attached hand written labels and sometimes label maker labels to files.
3. Sorted through own personal opinions as to who was "right" in each case.

POO FACTORY
1. Found pieces of poo in life: the street, a field, a shoe.
2. Made piles according to color, texture and firmness: sometimes age of poo put into consideration.
3. Made labels with label maker for individual pieces of poo and sorted alphabetically. (some of my fave poo names were: coiny, furry, mike)

a new monday and a new temporary thing

This is the face of sorting.

I think when I look at myself in the mirror, I think to myself,"Hey, I look like I can sort things". Today I embarked on yet another job of sorting things. I must say, that I do love a free lunch, which I enjoyed with my friend the wonderful and talented Lianne Stokes, who has saved me from the depths of despair with this job.

I stuffed my gullet full of F-R-E-E food while sorting through costume jewelry. It was just like college. Perhaps my mother would be somehow proud of me because of her love for costume jewelry, fake bear jackets, and too much eye shadow. Perhaps I am revealing too much.

Keep this date in your planner

Hi friends.
Keep this date in your planner.
December 9
8pm
Galapagos....
It is then that I will host a Holiday Spectacular of sorts.
Yamaholiday!
(This is the working title)
or maybe
Holimoto!
Hmmn... It maybe doesn't have to revolve around my name.
I'm sorry. I am a little self obsessed. Disgusting.
But just put this in your calendar. It'll be fun. There'll be eggnog and fun and booze and just fun!

Show for the masses

See this!


BRUTAL HONESTY
Wednesday October 26, 2005
Hosted by me, Lianne Stokes And Giulia Rozzi (who's birthday it is today! Happy Birthday Giulia!)

9pm
FREE!
Otto's Shrunken Head
538 E 14th St between A & B
This month the sensational stories will be about Googling.
Oh the shame.

See you there!

This is what I did this weekend.
I like shaking hips and all that.
I think that sometimes I don't like it when now I feel like my head is about to explode.

Besides that, today I had a lot of soup. Five servings I think.
That seems excessive.

should i keep it?

I moved recently and found that I have far too many outfits.
So in an attempt to lead a simpler life, I have thrown out tons and tons of clothing but still find that there are some items I cannot part with.

Here is one piece for example:




It belonged to my mother and I can honestly say I've never seen anything like this before. They really don't make them like this any more--ladies, but then again I don't know if I'd dream up anything like this, and I don't know why I would.

Unfortunately since it really is vintage, there is a hole in the middle. I could easily sew this but let's get real. I'm very lazy.



But it does have this nice collar. Very nice.
It could be a costume or something like that?

Buffet out Hawaiian in Buffet in

Last week I was very much into buffet. For lunch 3 out of 5 work days last week I had buffet--my favorite being the New Star Deli because it wasn't too crowded and the food for the most part, was delicious.
This week a new Hawaiian place opened up nearby and I thought that I would make my dad proud by eating the food of his people--which consists mainly of meats and rice. The first day I ordered in some BBQ chicken and rice and the second day I ventured into the restaraunt to have some chicken katsu (right now I feel super Asian as I write this) and it was delicious in the moment but my stomach hurt for a little while.
I think I will be returning to the buffet tomorrow. Why I decided to eat fried chicken leftovers this morning still puzzles me. I'm a daredevil?

SOMETHING SOMETHING HOPE

(photo: Chris Cassidy -- casspix.com)
This is me as Rosie McDavis, a Carnival Cruise diva fo sho. Oh Rosie.

See this show. We had a great opening night. So fun. Yay!

SOMETHING SOMETHING HOPE
A solo show
Written and Performed by Becky Yamamoto

Directed by Alan Fessenden
Produced by Group 120
$10
Juvie Hall
24 Bond Street (Bowery & Lafayette)
Under the Gene Frankel Theater

Appearing with
I THINK I'M DUMB
A solo show
Written and Performed by Alan Fessenden
Directed by Eugene Cordero

Opening Weekend
Thursday, July 28, 8pm
Friday, July 29, 10
Sunday, July 31, 2pm

August 4-7
August 11-14
Thursday-Saturday Shows, 8pm
Sunday Matinee Shows, 2pm

Shows July 18 - 23 and also

Wednesday, July 20
9pm
BRUTAL HONESTY
FREE
(I co produce this story telling series with lovelies Giulia Rozzi and Lianne Stokes.)

Otto's Shrunken Head
538 E 14th St between A & B

This month: Crushes
Guests: Tony Carnevale, Molly Anderson, Pete Olson, Brandy Barber
Omigod, this will be so fun. It'll be like a sleepover and we tell each other who our crushes are and then one of us will be made fun of the whole night and cause drama, but then we'll all laugh again over a bowl of ice cream. It'll be like that. So come to the show.

*****
Me as Rosie Mc Davis
Full Moon Friday, July 22nd
doors at 8pm - $3

@ STAIN bar
766 Grand St. - Williamsburg

L to Grand, walk one block west
*Dance party starts at 11pm!

freaky funky family
*The anti-oppression festival of culture, art and revolution

I think this is a culture-ey night, which made me say "Sure, I'll be there". I like culture.

*******

Saturday, July 23
I will be performing with my team Stomping Ground. Yay!
Stomping Ground at the Del Close Marathon
11:30 AM (morning, oh dear)
$5 (I think? I know it costs money. I don’t know how much. Oh well.)

*******

Saturday, July 23
The Shark Show
8pm
$5
Parkside Lounge
317 E Houston St

I will be doing the stand up here. I heart this show. Everyone there is so nice.
*******

AND COMING UP...

SOMETHING SOMETHING HOPE
A solo show
Written and Performed by Becky Yamamoto
Directed by Alan Fessenden
Produced by Group 120
$10
Juvie Hall
24 Bond Street (Bowery & Lafayette)
Under the Gene Frankel Theater

Opening Weekend
Thursday, July 28, 8pm
Friday, July 29, 10
Sunday, July 31, 2pm

And then later
August 4-7
August 11-14
Thursday-Saturday Shows, 8pm
Sunday Matinee Shows, 2pm

a cheese danish

Really what I ate this morning was labeled "Cheese Pocket". It looked innocent enough. It was topped with a glaze and toasted almonds. It should have been delicious. It was okay.

These are pictures for "Brutal Honesty" that were thrown to the cutting room floor.
(The next one by the way is July 20 at Otto's Shrunken Head.)





I think this one is my favorite:


Another one:


Earlier that night (somewhere at a singles mixer...I can explain that some other time):


Tony Carnevale doing his impression of Alan Fessenden:



Overall I give the evening 4 stars out a possible 5, and in my book, that's pretty dandy.

(this photo was taken last year in beautiful Seattle, WA by my Best in Show friend, Crystal Curtis.)

This week, no hollas. I think it's because I've taken to more modesty, less skin. More cloth, less clevage. America could learn from me. America, pay attention. We could all take a lesson from Sister Wendy. We could be nuns.

something from a couple days ago and also today

I need to catch you up on my non holla-ing news.

Two days ago while walking from the bus to the subway, I was in my own world listening to my ipod. I don't know what I was listening to. I think it was the Velvet Underground (is that lame to admit?) because I wasn't paying attention to where I was walking and almost got hit by one car and then almost got hit by another huge huge yellow suv thing. I was very frightened, but I still got a coffee (an iced americano).
Does that count as a holla?

Yesterday, I didn't really leave the house. Kinda.

Today, in the deli, this one man in a blue polo and baseball hat said, "Hey Mami" while I went to pay for my gross egg and cheese on a roll.

holla count in the last three days: 2
outfits: Day 1: grey tshirt and black shorts
Day 2: black dress and navy hoodie
gross egg sandwiches: 1