GENIUSES OF LOVE MOTHAFUCKA
(a night of lonely hearts)
Geniuses of Love!
Galapagos
Back room
Feb 14
8pm
$5
70 North 6th Street
between Kent and Wythe
Williamsburg, Brooklyn, NY 11211
718 782-5188

Do you feel like love is hiding from you? Maybe it's hiding in the forest of self-doubt, or in the mall of recriminations. It could even be in the dentist's office of despair. Wherever love is hiding, love experts Becky Yamamoto and Tony Carnevale will help you sniff it out. Join them and an army of entertaining special guests at 8pm on Valentine's Day at Galapagos. Featuring: Rachel Kramer Bussel, Chelsea Peretti, Patrick Borelli, Lang Fisher, Michelle Collins, Carolyn K. Castiglia, Alan Fessenden, Joe Randazzo, Frank Philbrick, Mike Barry, sketch group A Week of Kindness, and the band Ladystein.

grizzly man

I saw "Grizzly Man" last night, that documentary about this man who loved bears so much he lived with them in the forest and eventually got eaten by a bear. Some called him "retarded" others thought of him as a kindred spirit, and others saw him as a meal. (this is my shortened version. Maybe you should see it on your own and come to your own conclusions. I don't claim to be a movie reviewer, but I think I would give it 3 out of 5 paws.)But this bear here, this bread bear is my revenge on that bear. I can eat this bread bear and it can't fight back. Or bear claws, those delicious pastries that you serve with coffee in the morning and serve 4-5 people. Yum. I could eat a bear claw and dive into this bear bread. I am making myself hungry. I could also then eat a fruit plate and maybe an egg sandwich and then wash it down with some coffee or maybe a tea.

so

So maybe you think this discussion about Michelle Kwan is over, but it's not. Hey, she's got big nostrils. I said it and I don't care.
No. I don't mean to be such a jerk. I just wanted to see how much I could really write about her and somehow relate it back to me.

Let's have this discussion. I'm on the Asian tip now. So, I know most of us look the same, us Asians and you can't tell the difference between a Korean and a Japanese. Fine.
Here take this test http://www.alllooksame.com/default.asp and see if you know your Asians. I failed the test. I don't know my Asians. Honestly I think they trick you by having Asians with dyed hair. The dyed hair will get you every time. Is that guy um? Shit. Clearly that guy is like...I have no clue.
It's fine. Admit it. I look like Woody Allen's wife/daughter and Connie Chung. It's fine.

michelle kwan?

So Michelle Kwan...an obvious topic of discussion for me. As a kid, the only Asian sports figure I looked up to was that tennis player Michael Chang. In fact when he won the US Open or whatever, my dad took me to the tennis court to hit some balls around (tennis balls). I think we both knew I would never be a tennis star, but it was worth dreaming, right?
So Michelle Kwan, she may go to the Olympics. Maybe I can go one day too. The first time I went ice skating with my Girl Scout troupe, my mom sensibly packed a white leotard and tights. The other girls had curduroy pants and I was left there to look like an ice princess. My mother knew then what I know now...that I was meant to skate. I am here to skate for you.

cute

The cute thing. So there is that recent
New York Times article about cuteness and it got me thinking about cuteness. Part of the reason Pandas have survived extinction is due to how irresistably cute they are. I'll admit it. I wish I could cuddle with a Panda. And sure, I love things that are cute. I'll even go "ooh" "awwww" and tilt my head at cuteness.

It makes me wonder... If there were a huge Panda that wanted to take over the world would we let it just because it's cute? I think we would. And the Panda would make us do weird things like build amusement parks based on bamboo and make our children speak Panda and we'd have to wear mits to make our hands look like bear paws. I'm not saying we'd be miserable. I'm just saying that life would be very very different from the life we know now.
There would be libraries where the only things you could borrow would be rodents and bamboo seeds to grow bamboo. Also, no one could ever wear a pelt of any kind. We'd be oppressed dammit, and the ugly things of the world, the haggard opossum would laugh and say, "Look, it's your own damned fault. You let a Panda rule the world". And there would be tears.

upcoming things

Brutal Honesty
January 10
8pm
Otto's Shrunken Head
Free!
This month's topic:
Temp Jobs!

Featuring:
Lang Fisher
Baron Vaughn
Joe Devito

and as always hosted by Lianne Stokes, Giulia Rozzi and me



and coming soon:















Geniuses of Love!
aka Tony Carnevale and Becky Yamamoto
Feb 14 2006
Galapagos Art Space
with special guests
8pm